In a recent article, humorist Dave Barry discussed the addictive quality of the snack food, Cheez-Its. "Lots of death, lots and lots of death in this section. The whole meal thing was about the only interesting thing to happen during the week. Today I had the misfortune of playing a Treasure Planet game on neopets.com It was terrible. There is a world where you were never born. It is the extraordinary sensory quality of his prose that enabled Faulkner to get away with writing the longest sentence in literature, at least according to the 1983 Guinness Book of World Records, a passage from Absalom, Absalom! These "faeries" sprinkle your food with highly toxic "age dust" and ruin a perfectly good four-year-old meatloaf. I don't want to be in this messI'm going to bed. Wellnow that I think about itaccording to my theory, ALL conspiracies are real and mislabled "paranoid" people are really the only ones who see the truth. Ormaybe it's the feather off of the cartoon owl from the tootsie-roll pop comercials (onetwothree..*crunch*). I'm like the little engine that could. That made him happy. *enter Squirell* What's that, little Squirell? Yes. This is actually my third attempt at doing this. Food industires would be buying cars, gas and music. Not only that, but It also displays the longest sentence used in the text and the number of characters and words in the sentences. Which is bad. I mean, don't you think the creators of Cheese-Nips had a box of Cheez-Its out when they were designing their product? Should you violate the purpose of this site: i.e. we had to get there one hour and fifteen minutes early because there was traffic. If I did, would I stop this? Unless someone does something, Neo, Morpheus and many others will die. Or maybe not. First devised by professor William J. Rapaport in 1972, this notorious sentence plays on reduced relative clauses, different part-of-speech readings of the same word, and center embedding. You seethey feel that the only way to reward academic achievementyada-yada-yadais to force the smart kids to be ushers for Senior Honor Nite, and Graduation. These links send stuff to someone named johnjones333@hotmail.com The Patron Saint of Paper Clips does not know who this individual is, but sincerly wishes that you send all your hate mail to him. "angry mob form"? I know, unlikely, huh? Now I have a purpose in life! Our mind's cannot conceive of the vastness of infinity. What a crazy idea. I probley wouldn't actually print this out (think how much paper it would take!) I've been obsessed with various webcomics, creating the stupidly long new Phobia Quiz and being maniacly hysterical about my site always being down due to bandwith issues. Ain't it nifty? Oh, well. I am here to bring AWARNESS to your moosey soul! These so-called "pointless" signs are doing just what they were meant to do: entertain you! longest text ever (most deleted bc max 40000 letters) : (. You can thank my associate "Meg" she came up with the PSOA acronym. And then I'll be writing for me again. It's yours for only 3 bi-monthly payments of $3.95 ($3,95,000 on days ending in "y")Don't forget, Dum-B-Gon is practically guaranteed! They started shaking and barked their little heads off. To pour your heart and soul into a passage, and have everyone ignore it. In obscure cookbooks. And then go door to door distributing it. Which I suppose may be a good thing, seeing as how I'm currently in a Longest Text Ever Rivalry with Galaxy Dreamer's site. Since then, hundreds of authors have been inspired by the experimental writers sentence structure, including James Joyce, Virginia Woolf, F. Scott Fitzgerald, Samuel Beckett, and other modern literature greats. ON TO THE CONPIRACY OF THE DAY! So, fellow conspiracy nuts: Take down the evil governmental safety device and take it apart. I'm an evil villain, kitty and a freakazoid so far. If you judged everything by what it doesn't acomplish, then the entire world is populated by pointless beings. Imagine reading a novel with a sentence that was 40 000 words long! I'm back. [Copy and paste OK! Example sentence] How to write a "Reply" email? It was bad enough that I was forced to "volunteer" my precious time (i could have worked on this site)noI was forced to wear formal attire. Oh, well. that was recognised in the 1983 Guinness Book of World Records was the longest ever written. I tell people I know about this site, but they either ignore this page, or don't even bother coming to the site in the first place. I'm just rambling. Or maybe I am monumentally bored and don't have anything else to do at the moment. He acted like he was really being tortured and stuff. ME: Yep. I'm so special. That is a direct quote from GIR, co-star and comic-relief on INVADER ZIM. The Longest Long Words List | Merriam-Webster I see. Why, the assasinating annoying cartoon characters buisness. Molly's soliloquy is a touchstone for writers aiming to go long. It would hum, and hum, and humand then mercifully die. It will be a truly magestic site, as it launches from the earth, spewing excess oxygen, cardboard, feathers and tape. That sounds good, too. Or maybe I just wanna go to bed. (There's probably drugs in it). I think. He tried to kill me! ", or "Wow, I never knew that!" That is the only possible explanation as to why it upsets her so much. There are not enough words in the English language to describe the sheer coolness of the fight choreography, special effects and the plot. "Pure" water manufactuerers are not required to list the ingredients of water, because the average consumer believes that it should be obvious. Jonathan Coe's new novel - The Rotters' Club - contains a sentence of 13,955 words. Sometimes, it is lazy. Next to the Really Big Button, of course. I'll add a link to the main page when I get around to it. The single greatest invention of the computer gods. I SEE WHAT IS TRANSPIRING HERE!!! longest text ever (most deleted bc max 40000 letters) - reddit Before you know it, we'll have orange alligators, pink tigers and blue lions. It only takes a little light to help those thingies, and smoke detectors provide more than a little. But, for a time, Faulkner took the run-on as far as it could go. 11. Of course, if everything is realthen the Universe is pretty contradictory. But I can't help but think of stuff like the evil over lord list and REALLY REALLY BIG BUTTON THAT DOESN'T DO ANYTHING. Or, would that be good? I've decided to imortalize the stupidity of my dog, Moose. They give lots and lots of homework. Why, you ask? I can usually fall back asleep (if I don't panic and think I'm late for school), but the stupid thing wakes me up again exactly seven hours after I originally fell asleep. Those are the best kind. The food trucks could even play music that made you hungry for their food. (Next Commercial) Get ready fo: Faux's new "reality" TV show, "How Low Can We Go?" there were bugs. Well, at least she knows that slaves were involved in the war. I think that such gender-specific torture should be deemed inhumane and abolished from our great societyof flaming chickens. The world of literature is full of examples of sprawling monologues and multi-line descriptions, but it was American writer William Faulkner who was featured in the 1983 Guinness Book of World Records for his lengthy passage from his 1936 book, Absalom, Absalom! Longest math problem copy and paste According to Sciencealert, the longest math equation contains around 200 terabytes of text. its dark and I want to go home is where the heart was where is it now? Eventually, this would become a monthly tradition. So rather than battle her over the concept of getting dressed in the dark, I get up. I usually have less than 30 minutes. I ended up writing things during the time of night when EVERYTHING is hilarious, including the word sheep. Unless he has already been destroyed by an even more radical Anti-Cartoon-Owl group. I hope I remember doing this. They're disgusting, bland and definitly not made of cheez, whatever that is. Yeah, this doesn't mean anything to you. Not one of those bargain ones anyone can find at your local topic discount outlet store. Oh, guess what? AhhhI see your confusion! I was bored, and a dilligent reader suggested I make fake commercials, sotherer they are. Think about it. Seeya. But one of my classes is work, and two others are horrible year-round classes. What? But, believe me, it's MUCH more practical than the alternative. consisting of 1,288 words and who knows how many different kinds of clauses. Maybe. Then I wait for my mom and dad to stop playing Collapse II so that I can get on. Yea, me! It just sounded very professional to say it. It's pathetic. I sure hope other zoos won't copy them. I can work with mistrust. Meanwhile there is a vast conspiracy at school to keep me ignorant about my pawn roll in the other vast conpiracy by keeping me vastly bored. 'Ah the power of cheese!' I'm back, and I had yet another Asparagus War with some people. Perhaps Kodak is actually a front organization for a shadowy governmental system that controls the entire world and didn't want mankind to obtain the freedom of the stars and so tried to sabotauge the space program even though it didn't work as well as they planned. -works best on pc/laptop. So next semester I'll still have work, AP Lit, and AP Physics. She said she hurt it the first time, and wanted to put it out of it's misery, so she went back and ran over it 11 more times. She agrees, but only after seeing how important it is to him. How did you ever guess? Yea*waits for applause* okay! Kodak, as you may know, is a film developing company. I figure that even the people I manage to lure onto my site from neopets don't even bother to come to this particular page. Come on, I won't hurt you, I promise! But somewhere, it exists. *sighs dramatically* I'm back. The reason I have to get up at 6 something is that III ride the bus to school. Please allow 6-8 weeks for delivery. All the other internet writers have nothing on me, except they're better at advertising, having a central theme/plot and basically more talented. Now, correct me if I'm wrongbut Iraq? SHARE. actually claim to be mentally ill. That's either a) a publicity stunt b) An attempt at humor c) a cry for help or d) none of the above You can e-mail your responses by conducting a scavenger hunt of this site. It's so completly garbled, it's funny. Think about it. Wellseeya! Look how long this has gotten. That makes me feel alll warm and fuzzy inside. Today's rant is a panic rant. Oh, sorry, I thought you knew I was a furry. By the time you're eighty, you'll have enough ear jewelry to open up your own jewelry shop. if you like our Facebook fanpage, you'll receive more articles like the one you just read! Unsubscribe at any time. At one point, I read an article that stated that it had been proven, conclusivly, that Kansas was flatter than the standard pancake. Did you understand that? I'll probably have another one soon, but that whole water thing has been buggin me for awhile. And on to:#4You make your friends look normal in comparison. I have an extra-special rant for you all today, to celebrate the new domain name! were stuck in here, (alone my dear) and well problem never get out so dont start to shout. That just sounds nifty! my dear theres nothing to fear thats only a box thats made of blocks next to the wagon that looks like a dragon why are you shaking its your fear that is making you shiver and act all a quiver. By clicking Accept, you consent to the use of ALL the cookies. You exploud. But, if it had remained that way, I would have had no impetus to continue my pointlessly insane ranting. Or I could be like that annoying guy on T.V. Now, I'm sure you've at least heard of subliminal messages , right? MOstly donut cake. No longer does school teach use reading, riting and 'rithmitic, it now teaches us ranting, raving and rambling! "Mr. Owl, can you tell us how many licks does it take to get to the bottom of a tootsie pop?" Someday, I'm gonna snap and just delete this entire thing. 51 min ago WellI DO have a special treat for you weirdos who apparantly like wasting time! Or maybe the Energizer Bunny. Pikachuwellhe didn't like me. HA! But that is irrelevant. I'm finnaly back! The movie ends with him in a coma. I got to go to a huge library, and see Terminator 3 at the local theater. 1,288 words and many clauses make up the lengthy run-on phrase. I fervently hope that you're not thinking the last twoespecially about Kodak. According to my theory that everything is real. by the time I had to do my part (tell people where to stand before getting their diploma) it was dark. We have ZIM, neopets, music, and much, much, more. OhI'm rambling again, aren't I? WE got it at Wal-mart. And almost never finish. The workers would then be able to afford more entertainment items and the upward spiral would continue, as opposed to the evil downward spiral of my writing. Of course, there is also regretafter all, I could have made a fortune if I'd been the first to think of it. If you want neat, go to some other site(though, as mentioned in Flaming Chickens Code:472 there is no such thing as a site better than this one). Which is why it's not even 10:00 and here I am, typing. "Purified" water. And I asked myself "How could I have better spent my time?" It's hard to type because of the bandaid on my finger. Only if I had multiple personalities. It tooked about envelooping (enveloping) cracked nuts and parables. It makes me sad*sniffle* WellI feel better now. Uhyou don't have to take the subliminal stuff seriously. I hope not. It's amazing, it's incredible, it's unbelievable. All contents of this site were designed for entertainment purposes only. But, the wings were'nt really special. Goodbye! You cannot judge them simply because they have no apparant function. They associated tans with hard, manuel labor. Yeaha topic would be good. Not only that, but how do you know that YOU actually exist? Yes, that's right. **** MY NAVEL ITCHES!! Pure means, well, no extra stuff. I can't think of anything!? Yep that's right. Come on everyone, group hug. Get the best cultural and educational resources on the web curated for you in a daily email. Couldn't you just stick some jelly in a piecrust and bake it? It's really stressfull. "Traditionally, the longest sentence in English Literature has been said to be a sentence in Ullyses by James Joyce, which clocks in at 4,391 words. And why do I even care? You can read a little each day. 44 min ago The Longest Sentence In The English Language Wellit's not. Longest math equation copy paste - Math Textbook I don't think. Although I can't see why you care, because there is a large probability that you do not exist, because I don't think anyone is reading this anymore. It was fairly fun. You know the one. We accept PayPal, Venmo (@openculture), Patreon and Crypto! You must check out the fortunes section of the random stuff page! I'm not exactly sure what that means, but it sure is funny:) You don't agree? Don't worry, I'll go to bed soon. Anyway, only watch wal-mart if you WANT to be subliminaly entertained into purchasing a new set of TUPERWARE, even though your old set is PERFECTLY fine. Not only does Faulkners deep affiliation with his characters inner lives elevate his portraits far above the level of local color or regionalist curiosity, but it animates his sentences, makes them constantly move and breathe. Unfortunatly, I once again am devoid of a topic. This sentence makes strategic use of the past perfect, two times. WaitI really don't even know if anyone bothers to read this. i felt sorry for my dad. Completly defeated, I told her that it was the religion she practiced every Sunday when she went with her friends to church. Okay. Oh, but I did remember what else I wanted to say to you people. He may have had no intention of inspiring postmodern fiction, but one of its best-known novelists, Barth, only found his voice by first writing a heavily Faulknerian marsh-opera. Many hundreds of experimental writers have had almost identical experiences trying to exorcise the Oxford, Mississippi modernists voice from their prose. Well, too bad! I don't want year-round classes. BoyI really enjoy confusing myself! Butthat'd be a lot of work, unlike ranting, raving and rambling. Well. That must be it. : I've had this nagging fear that I am part of some random but vast conspiracy (about what I'm not sure but it must be vast). > You have blue hari..*gigles* I like hair. I bet you were just breathless in anticipation. William Faulkner was featured in 1983 Guinness Book of World Records for this 1,288-word sentence from Absalom, Absalom! SHE has to get up at 6:11 to put on make-up, do her hair and basically annoy the heck out of me. Although why you'd be here if you didn't want to read is beyond me. I mean, after all, I made this site. Let's see: 12345! (it's edited, of course, to stay PG13**** signifies a random naugty word:)) "HEY, DOG ENTITY! That way I can just outlaw the need for gravity and air pressure! Hmmmmmmonkey. The title contains the longest word. I'm not sure how I CAN be brief since I have absolutly nothing to say. Wow. The first use of "had had" is a modifier, and the second instance serves as the main verb of the sentence. I'm sure some so called "scientist" can prove all my theories wrongbut how? Today, in my (Honors) English class, we did group work. Isn't that sort of ironic? People just don't realize that their almonds and mixed nuts may be having depression and other problems. I made a virtual pet for it. I'm leavingnow I'm back! You figure that one of those 100 people would actually have a coherent phrase. And if you expect something and get nothing, you feel cheated. It'd be like when you go to the bottom of the ocean, only with gravity instead of pressure*shudders* Pressure is evil, too. Celebrating creativity and promoting a positive culture by spotlighting the best sides of humanityfrom the lighthearted and fun to the thought-provoking and enlightening. I added to the lenghth of the LTE without even thinking! Just like thos so called "diet supplements" that give you a "free" sample because they know that once you try it, you'll like it so much you'll spend oodles of cash on it. Yeah, I know, regular schedule schools do that. (Although my mother does have a "earring tree".) UnfortunantlyI must leavebefore the confusion spreads and I do something stupidlike revealing my one weakness before youTHAT'S IT!